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I've changed my mind. The threat of being in trouble has not worked. She still cried for me to come back. She'll settle for Daddy too, although not without some persistence on his part.
I lie down with her now. Sometimes I leave, telling her I'll come back after feeding Seth or whatever and that I'd like her to be asleep when I get back. Last night I stayed and got a 30 minute nap.
Although I keep thinking she should be able to go to sleep on her own, she does have a new little brother, making everything change for everybody. Plus, she's really sweet at bedtime (that is, now that I've indulged her.) She's cuddly, and silly. She turns into sleeping position and gets quiet when I tell her.
She wakes up every night for one reason or another. She's been getting chilly and her nose runny. I hope the extra blanket helps. For three nights, she's tried to get in bed with us in the middle of the night. Fortunately, she's too sleepy to argue and goes back to her bed. Some mothers would probably take the infant with her and nurse him in the toddlers bed. But I really like my space :)